


You cared.

by FANGIRL_SHIPPER_NERD185



Series: Carmilla's Secrets and Stories [2]
Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2015-10-06
Packaged: 2018-04-25 04:34:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4946887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FANGIRL_SHIPPER_NERD185/pseuds/FANGIRL_SHIPPER_NERD185
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not the best. Carmilla is still getting better, and Laura is helping. It sucks. Sorry.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You cared.

Carmilla had been clean for a week. Laura had searched their room up and down for anything that Carm might use to cut herself, but she stayed with her when ever she could. “You can’t take away her fangs.” Perry had said, who Laura had told along with Laf and Danny. Carmilla had given Laura permission to do so, knowing that the extra help to keep her safe would help. Today, Carmilla was sleeping late, and Laura was writing a letter to her dad. Just as she signed her name on the bottom, Carmilla stepped out of the bed. “Morning cupcake. How’d ya sleep?” Laura stood up and waked to Carmilla. “I slept like a brick. You?” Pecking a small kiss to Laura’s lips, Carmilla whispered, “It was fine.” Laura smiled, and took her girlfriends hands. “You sure?” Carmilla half heartedly smiled. “Yeah. I am.” With that, Carmilla turned to go to the closet and get her clothing to get dressed.   
A few hours later, Perry knocked on the door. Carmilla opened it, now wearing a pair of long black skinny jeans and a t-shirt with a band logo on it. Perry smiled at Carmilla, seeing the old scars on her arms. Carmilla smiled and look at the floor, still ashamed of her wounds. “Laura wanted me to wear a t-shirt..She said that I needed to stop being afraid..” “You don’t have to explain yourself, Carmilla. It’s quite brave of you.” Carmilla turned back to the dorm, and walked over to Laura, who was reading a book on philosophy. “Trying to figure me out, sweetheart?” Laura looked up, and smiled at Carmilla. “Nah, just wondering why you like this so much. Hey Perrs. What’s up?” Perry smiled, saying, “Oh, nothing. Just wanted to see what’s up. Lafontaine and JP are in the library, and Danny is working with some summers to rebuild the library.” Laura smiled and shrugged. “We got up a while ago. I don’t think we have any plans. Carm?” The raven-haired head shook. “Nothing that I can think of. What were you thinking about, Curly Red?” Perry rolled her eyes at Carmilla’s nickname. “Nothing much, just a movie.” Laura perked up. She had not been to a theater in a while. “What movie?” Perry shrugged. “I don’t know. The Lazarus Effect?” Carmilla nodded with agreement. All of them had heard of the film, and had been interested. “Alright. It’s settled.”  
When they got out of the movie, Perry was remembering why she didn’t like horror movies. “It wasn’t even that scary!” Said Laura, who had Carmilla’s arm around her back. Perry shook her head in disagreement, quietly saying, “Well, You weren't exactly paying attention!” Laura turned a light pink, and looked at Carmilla, who shrugged. Laura reached up and wiped some smeared lipstick from Carmilla’s lips. Carmilla chuckled. Laura responded to Perry, “But still. I saw most of the film. And it honestly wasn’t that bad. Right, Carm?” “You can’t get her opinion, she’s seen actual monsters and hellfire!” Perry interjected, making Carmilla laugh. “She has a point, Cupcake. I have seen some terrible things.” Laura smiled weakly at Carmilla, who smiled softly back.   
When they got home, Carmilla hung up her leather jacket in the closet, and sat down on the bed. Laura went to the kitchenette, and grabbed a can of grape soda for herself, and poured some blood in a mug for Carmilla. Handing Carm the mug, she sat down next to her on the bed. “Hey.” Carmilla looked at Laura, and softly said, “Hey.” Taking a sip from her mug, Carmilla asked, “You okay?” “Yeah. Just still worried about you.” “You don’t have to be. You took my razors and knives.” “You still have fangs.” After considering it, Carmilla stated, “You have a point. But Vampire blood tastes like shit to vampires. And I don’t think that would be wise.” Laura nodded, agreeing. “Okay, but can I ask you something?” “Sure thing cupcake.” With a deep breath Laura choked out, “Why did you first start? Cutting, I mean.” Carmilla looked at the floor, and carefully said, “Well, I should have expected this question.”  
“One night when I was 11, My Father left the Castle where we lived. He went to a nearby town, and drank himself deaf. He came home, and he tried to kill one of the house servants on a drunken rage. When he saw me, he said, ‘The child that was never supposed to exist.’ Already, I was scared and really sad about a lot of stuff. But that..from the man who I loved more then anything, broke something. When I got to my room, I used a knife that I kept for self defence and I made a small cut on my wrist. The feeling I got was…” She paused, trying to find the right words. “Numbing. Almost peaceful. I had found a way to turn the emotional bullshit I had bottled up into a physical pain. But the physical pain hurt so much less. I wasn’t a crier, never was, never will be. So this..became a release. An Addiction. And one I couldn’t stop.” With that, she looked at the floor again, and became silent. Laura didn’t know what to say. So she just sat with Carmilla, and put her arm around her back. She rested her head against the brunettes shoulder, and stayed like that for the next two hours.   
When Carmilla spoke, it was just to say, “You were the first person to care. The rest just thought that I was more of a freak.” Laura smiled against Carmilla’s hair,and said, “I will always care. No matter what.” Carmilla blushed a little, and turned to the door. “Do you wanna get some dinner?” With a calm eye roll, Laura laughed, “Are vampires bloodsuckers?” “Hilarious, Hollis.” With a quick kiss to her cheek, Laura said to Carmilla, “Well, What do you expect?” Carmilla laughed, knowing that she never wanted anything else.


End file.
